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Sep 22
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When the Waves Have Come and Gone Plage des Catalans
Sep 22
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Ideas and Ideals: Strong Female Voices III ONLINE EVENT  Albertine Bookstore/French Embassy 972 Fifth Avenue New York, NY 10075 
Sep 22
Talk
Ideas and Ideals: Strong Female Voices III ONLINE EVENT  Albertine Bookstore/French Embassy 972 Fifth Avenue New York, NY 10075 

Our Grateful Dead: Stories of Those Left Behind

Vinciane Despret | Translated by Stephen Muecke

A common remedy after suffering the loss of a loved one is to progress through the “stages of grief,” with “acceptance” as the final stage in the process. But is it necessary to leave death behind, to stop dwelling on the dead, to get over the pain? Vinciane Despret thinks not. In her fascinating, elegantly translated book, this influential thinker argues that, in practice, people in all cultures continue to enjoy a lively, inventive, positive relationship with their dead.

Through her unique storytelling woven from ethnographic sources and her own family history, Despret assembles accounts of those who have found ways to live their daily lives with their dead. She rejects the idea that one must either subscribe to “complete mourning” (in a sense, to get rid of the dead) or else fall into fantasy and superstition. She explores instead how the dead still play an active, tangible role through those who are living, who might assume their place in a family or in society; continue their labor or art; or thrive from a shared inheritance or an organ donation. This is supported by dreams and voices, novels, television and popular culture, the work of clairvoyants, and the everyday stories and activities of the living. For decades now, in the West, the dead have been discreet and invisible. Today, especially as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic, Despret suggests that perhaps we will be willing to engage with the dead in ways that bring us happiness despite our loss. 

Despret’s unique method of inquiry makes her book both entertaining and instructive. Our Grateful Dead (University of Minnesota Press, 2021) offers a new, pragmatic approach to social and cultural research and may indeed provide compassionate therapy for those of us coping with death.


Vinciane Despret is associate professor of philosophy at University of Liège and Free University of Brussels. Her eight books include Women Who Make a Fuss (with Isabelle Stengers) and Our Emotional Makeup.

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